Archive for June, 2017

A Bird’s Eye View #500 – 21st June, 2017

Thursday, June 22nd, 2017

Greetings one and all. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… Please remember to keep the windows cracked if you leave pets in your vehicle for any amount of time – if you don’t they will die a horrible death…
Moving on, I must first point out that almost everything below is true, probably around 99%. However, the whole truth is withheld because, as a wise Valley man known as Deekin’ once said, “If I told you the whole truth then you’d be as smart as me”… I like your thinkin,’ Deekin’…

Our intrepid investigative reporter, The Old Buzzard, never sleeps when there is news to report and so here is another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “So the Sierra Nevada World Music Festival has been and gone for its 12th consecutive year in the Valley, and I just wanted to add a few words on that topic… There are many Valley people who attend and enjoy the Festival, myself included in past years, and I am aware that the stores selling ice, bottled water, quality coffee, etc, can be busy, as was Mosswood Market before the music started each day, and even Lemons’ Market, several miles away in Philo. Furthermore, I am told there were very few negative incidents amongst the 6,000+ revelers and that the clean-up went well. However, Boonville’s eateries and places of libation would describe it as a myth that they benefit anywhere near as much financially from this event as the Festival owners would have us believe. When the Festival owners, Warren and Gretchen Smith, two very pleasant people, first came here back in 2006 seeking local support and met with local small business owners – I remember it vividly because I was there – they assured them that the event would be of great financial benefit. As it turns out, some are now of the opinion that the three-day music extravaganza actually has adverse financial affects on them (as did this year’s Beer Festival, although that is a different story entirely and the Valley as a whole benefits on many fronts from that event). The problem for such businesses is due not only to the Festival being virtually self-contained in terms of food and drink vendors, but also as a result of other out-of-towners, not here for the Festival, being unable to find parking outside the local dining establishments and therefore passing on through without a stop… Furthermore, many locals wished to avoid the crowds and they stayed away, foregoing their usual weekend meal in town… I certainly believe the event has a place here and it puts us ‘on the map’ with many folks possibly re-visiting the Valley at other times as a result of discovering the Valley for the first time at this event. But let’s not pretend that everyone in the Valley has only positive feelings about it. While the Festival can hardly come under the title of the Apocalypse (and if the Apocalypse brings the same sights of young women with bare-midriffs, balancing hula-hoops on their gyrating hips that hypnotically circle around then I cant wait for it), I would humbly suggest that the Festival organizers perhaps think twice before rejoicing publicly that there were ‘even more vendors here this year’ as if this was a particularly positive thing for everyone. Perhaps a little more sensitivity might be shown by them rather than simply basking in a false notion that the ‘good vibe’ is felt throughout the Valley, by one and all…”

Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… Following constructive input from non other than Captain Rainbow, aka R. Salisbury, I have made this paragraph, and parts of the next two, a little easier to read through quickly by putting the ‘title’ of each item in bold print – hopefully it will get past the censors. Anything I can do to help is fine with me. I hope he was right… Here we go… #544 – The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have no more visits to the Valley this month. They will be here at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo, twice next month – July 13 and 27… #545 – This Saturday, June 24, its the Open Mic’ night at Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville. Dinner served 5 to 9 before the Open mic starts at 9 pm. All are welcome – musicians, singers, poets, writers, impressionists, magicians, comedians, exotic dancers, animal callers, etc. No clowns – apparently they would scare any kids who might be there, and no mimes, please – they scare almost everyone else! For more information call 895-3869… #546 – I believe that the Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley next Tuesday, June 27. Phone 463-4694 for confirmation. They are usually here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm.… #547 – The Anderson Valley Museum is open every Saturday and Sunday from 1pm-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, visiting the Museum is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours to spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’… #548 – The Boonville Farmers’ Market continues each Saturday from 9.30am-Noon, at the Boonville Hotel parking lot generously donated each week by community-spirited hotelier J Schmitt. For more information, call Cindy at 895-2949…

As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, June 22, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Fish & Chips followed by Frozen Grasshopper dessert… Then, next Tuesday, June 27, the evening meal served at 6pm, will feature BBQ Ribs  with Triple Chocolate for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal – it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… There is a continuing Diabetes Workshop on Thursdays from 1-3pm. Hosted by the AV Health Center, to register please call 895-3477… Meanwhile, on Tuesday and Thursday from 9-9.45am the Center offers ‘Young at Heart Exercise’ with Linda Boudoures and Karen DeFalco… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am-Noon it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don’t forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

Let’s move on to more edible aspects of Valley life – the Turkey Vulture’s update on ‘Evening Dining in the Valley’… So work continues on the building in the heart of Philo that until recently had been the home of Libby’s Restaurant for the past sixteen years and, prior to that, various other eating and dining establishments since the mid-1940s when the whole building was transported there from Boonville (I suggest you read the local history book, ‘Then and Now – an Anderson Valley Journey’ for more information). I am reliably informed that a new restaurant will be going in there but anymore than that remains a mystery at this point… Meanwhile, in geographical order, as you travel through the Valley on Highway 128, here is the latest on ‘The Big Eight Eateries’ – soon to be ‘The Nighttime Nine’… Lauren’s Restaurant sees Libby (of Libby’s Restaurant in Philo fame) as the Guest Chef on Monday evening from 5-9pm, while their regular hours remain Thursday-Sunday, 11.30am-2.30pm for lunch, and dinner on Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9pm… Lizbby’s, the Mexican Restaurant in downtown Boonville, can be enjoyed Monday to Saturday from 10am-9pm, serving breakfast on Saturday, closed on Sunday… The Buckhorn is open on Saturdays and Sundays from 10am-Midnight, serving weekend brunch each day from 10am-3pm featuring Bloody Marys, Mimosas, Eggs Benedict, Pancakes, Biscuits & Gravy, and ‘healthy stuff’ like Jean’s Greek Yoghurt parfait served with muesli and fresh berries. They are open weekdays at 11am and are closed on Tuesdays… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu and have now expanded their hours to Thursday thru’ Monday evenings. They cook by reservation so call (707)-895-2210… The Q and Aquarelle, formerly Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar, has a new ‘Santa Maria BBQ’ menu, featuring ribs and chicken, added to their previous favorites. Open 4-8pm from Friday thru’ Taco Tuesday… The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do, with reliable hours that everyone can remember and rely on (6am-8pm every day!) – don’t forget to try the donuts… Stone and Embers in The Madrones is open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… Finally, down in the Deep End, The Bewildered Pig is open Thursday-Saturday, 4:30-5.30pm Happy Hour, Supper served from 5.30-9pm, and then on Sunday 11.30am-7pm. You can check out all of their “insane!” offerings on their well-maintained Facebook page… And that’s it for now… Meanwhile, I encourage you all to eat, drink, and be merry at one of the above establishments whenever you can – remember ‘eating out is fun’…

I’m outta here – I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again: be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and, I repeat, please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture9@gmail.com>
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… Missing the Venerable Pheasant… On the sheep, Grace…

A Bird’s Eye View #499 – 14th June, 2017

Friday, June 16th, 2017

Greetings one and all. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin…
Disappointingly, but not surprisingly, the American media’s default reaction to this last week’s terror attack in London was to assume the British people were “reeling.” The word, which means “to lose one’s balance and stagger or lurch violently,” implies the country had lost its way and was staggering around in the dark, consumed by shock and fear. However, as John Oliver, a Brit himself, explained on his tv show, Last Week Tonight’, the Brits found this characterization flatly insulting. He derided the notion that Britain “was somehow weak enough to be brought to its knees by three monumental assholes.”
British resilience and fortitude has never been in doubt to anyone with an insight into the country’s long and illustrious past. This is, after all, a country whose biggest cities have seen much worse. That “Keep Calm and Carry On” poster craze (and all its spin-offs) is actually from the Second World War, when Nazi bombing raids were leveling buildings in London and other British cities on a nightly basis for months on end and the Brits responded by going to work and doing their jobs as normal and of course taking the time to sit on the rubble and drink a hot cup of tea!
Of course, not every Brit’s reaction was calm or embodied British values. Nigel Farage, the absolute tosser who led his country into Brexit on the back of xenophobic fear-mongering and outright lies about expanding the national healthcare budget, went on Fox News to declare that “the calls for internment will grow.” (Farage is a noted ally of President Trump, and is “a person of interest” in the Russia investigation according to The Guardian newspaper. He bills himself as a populist outsider.) By this, Farage meant that Britons would soon demand that Muslims in Britain be put in internment camps as, in an act of national disgrace, the U.S. did to Japanese-Americans during World War II. That was the opposite of Britain’s “Keep Calm and Carry On” ethos then, and it will not be something that happens now, I can assure you. Farage and his ilk, together with the majority of U.S. news outlets, have got it wrong once again… It’s pathetic. Pass me the sick bag, please, Bruce…

Let’s move on to more edible aspects of Valley life – the Turkey Vulture’s update on ‘Evening Dining in the Valley’… Following constructive input from non other than Corporal Raindrop, previously Captain Rainbow, I have made this paragraph, and parts of the next two, a little easier to read through quickly by putting the ‘title’ of each item in bold print – hopefully it will get past the censors. Anything I can do to help is fine with me. I hope he was right… So work continues on the building in the heart of Philo that until recently had been the home of Libby’s Restaurant for the past sixteen years and, prior to that, various other eating and dining establishments since the mid-1940s when the whole building was transported there from Boonville (I suggest you read the local history book, ‘Then and Now – an Anderson Valley Journey’ for more information). I am reliably informed that a new restaurant will be going in there but I cannot as yet reveal what kind of restaurant that will be… Meanwhile, in geographical order, as you travel through the Valley on Highway 128, here is the latest on ‘The Big Eight Eateries’ – soon to be ‘The Nighttime Nine’… Lauren’s Restaurant sees Libby (of Libby’s Restaurant in Philo fame) as the Guest Chef every Monday evening from 5-9pm, while their regular hours remain Thursday-Sunday, 11.30am-2.30pm for lunch, and dinner on Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9pm… Lizbby’s, the Mexican Restaurant in downtown Boonville, can be enjoyed Monday to Saturday from 10am-9pm, serving breakfast on Saturday, closed on Sunday… The Buckhorn is open on Saturdays and Sundays from 10am-Midnight, serving weekend brunch each day from 10am-3pm featuring Bloody Marys, Mimosas, Eggs Benedict, Pancakes, Biscuits & Gravy, and ‘healthy stuff’ like Jean’s Greek Yoghurt parfait served with muesli and fresh berries! They are open weekdays at 11am and are closed on Tuesdays… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu and have now expanded their hours to Thursday thru’ Monday evenings. They cook by reservation so call (707)-895-2210… The Q and Aquarelle, formerly Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar, has a new ‘Santa Maria BBQ’ menu, featuring ribs and chicken, added to their previous favorites. Open 4-8pm from Friday thru’ Taco Tuesday… The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do, with reliable hours that everyone can remember and rely on (6am-8pm every day!) – don’t forget to try the donuts!… Stone and Embers in The Madrones is open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… Finally, down in the Deep End, The Bewildered Pig is open Thursday-Saturday, 4:30-5.30pm Happy Hour, Supper served from 5.30-9pm, and then on Sunday 11.30am-7pm. You can check out all of their “insane!” offerings on their well-maintained Facebook page… And that’s it for now… Meanwhile, I encourage you all to eat, drink, and be merry at one of the above establishments whenever you can – remember ‘eating out is fun’…

Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready…. #544 – The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have one more visit this month to the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo, that is tomorrow, Thursday June 15. They are there from 2-3.30pm but to avoid a line perhaps turn up at around 3pm – you will definitely be seen. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them – making this an even better service than it already is!…#545 – The A.V. Lending Library run by The Unity Club is open Tuesdays from 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm at The Fairgrounds in Boonville…#546 – The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Dump Executive Director, Mike Mannix, rewards good customers with a star but will be very harsh with anyone thinking they can leave dead animals!… #547 – Resuming their summer hours of 9.30am-Noon, the Boonville Farmers’ Market continues each Saturday at the Boonville Hotel parking lot generously donated each week by community-spirited hotelier J Schmitt. For more information, call Cindy at 895-2949…
As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville (895-3609). The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, June 15, the Senior Center will be closed… However, next Tuesday, June 20, the lunch will feature The Sausage Skillet followed by Holy Cow Cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal – it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Meanwhile, on Tuesday and Thursday from 9-9.45am the Center offers ‘Young at Heart Exercise’ with Linda Boudoures and Karen DeFalco… Every Thursday there is a Diabetes workshop hosted by our local health center – call 895-3477 to register… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am-Noon it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don’t forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond… All of our regulars were too busy watching the Warriors and attending the many school graduation ceremonies to contribute this week, apart from the stalwart reporter The Old Buzzard, who once again provides us with more wise words in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, ‘Last week President* Trump said that America will withdraw from the 2015 Paris climate accord, calling it a “draconian” pact that gives unfair economic advantages to poorer countries. European Union and Chinese officials, meeting in Brussels, issued a joint statement in defense of the agreement. The deal still has 194 signatories—albeit no longer the world’s second-largest polluter – the U.S.of A… Issues of concern over the ocean began the next day in New York as scientists, officials, executives and experts discuss how to save the sea by attending the Ocean Conference. Of particular concern will be overfishing (almost 90% of marine stocks are fished at or beyond sustainable limits), plastic pollution (by the middle of the century the ocean could contain, by weight, more plastic than fish) and the plight of coral reefs (most of which will struggle to survive the next three decades). Rising carbon-dioxide emissions are changing the ocean’s chemistry and temperature. The sea is now about 0.7°C warmer on average than it was in the 19th century. The best attempt so far to abate the larger changes, the Paris agreement on climate, will be weakened by the aforementioned withdrawal by the U.S. and none of President* Trump’s administration’s high-ranking officials are expected to attend the Ocean Conference. Oh dear, the approach of the Apocalypse is speeding up and it’s enough to make old salts like myself weep…”

Sobering thoughts indeed, Buzzard – but much appreciated to the realists among us, I’m sure… I’m outta here – I’ve got see a man about a sheep…So until we talk again: be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture – saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture9@gmail.com>
p.p.s. Keep on wagging that tail, Fred… Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!… Keep up the good work, Round-eyed Robin.

A Bird’s Eye View #498 – 7th June, 2017

Saturday, June 10th, 2017

Greetings one and all. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin…
Following the remarkably short-sighted and extremely serious wrong decision made by The President* last week regarding climate control, let’s start this week with another in our series, ’This Trump Thing,’ or as it had been known for nearly 250 years up until now The U.S. Presidency… (President* – this word just has to have an asterisk when referring to Trump)…
And who better to address this development than our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, ‘On Thursday, in a speech that was basically a towering pile of complete gibberish, President* Donald Trump told the country that the rest of the world is wrong. I didn’t think he could top his inaugural address for sheer fact-free and paranoiac nonsense, but he managed to do it. By announcing that the United States was withdrawing from the groundbreaking Paris Accords regarding the world climate crisis, the President* wallowed in xenophobic victimhood while basking in the scattered applause of the his sycophantic advisors whose self-respect is sufficiently low that they still work for him…
It was appalling. It was condescending. This was a speech written by a fool, to be delivered by a fool, with the presumption that a great percentage of its target audience is made up of fools.
But the really noxious stuff was the attempt at transforming a worldwide agreement to combat an existential threat to life on this planet into what he stupidly called a scheme to redistribute our wealth to China. The really noxious stuff was all that simpering about how the rest of the world is playing us for suckers and laughing at us, as though the rest of the world doesn’t think we’ve lost our mind as a nation simply by electing a vulgar talking bullying businessman like Trump.
President* Trump said, “The rest of the world applauded when we signed the Paris agreement. They went wild. They were so happy, for the simple reason that it put our country, the United States of America, which we love, at a very, very big economic disadvantage. A cynic would say that the obvious reasons were for economic competitiveness and their wish to see us remain in the agreement is that we continue to suffer from this self-inflicted economic wound. You see what’s happening. It’s pretty obvious to those who want to keep an open mind. At what point does American get demeaned? At what point do they start laughing at us at a country? We want fair treatment for our citizens, and fair treatment for our taxpayers and we don’t want other leaders and other countries laughing at us any more”…
He spoke like a spoiled and angry child with the assumption that he was addressing and audience made up of angry children. He lined the United States up with the anti-science side of the most pressing global issue of our time… And yet, none of that matters in the big picture as, while the President* was speaking, a huge chunk of Antarctica was preparing to break off. The nonsense he spewed doesn’t matter – the oceans are not listening to him and the ultimate Apocalypse is now approaching far more quickly than it was a week ago… Trump must go…’

Let’s move on to more edible aspects of life – the Turkey Vulture’s update on ‘Evening Dining in the Valley’… In geographical order, as you travel through the Valley on Highway 128, here is the latest on ‘The Big Eight Eateries’… Lauren’s Restaurant sees Libby (of Libby’s Restaurant fame) as the Guest Chef every Monday evening from 5-9pm, while their regular hours remain Thursday-Sunday, 11.30am-2.30pm for lunch, and dinner on Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9pm… Lizbby’s, the Mexican Restaurant in downtown Boonville, can be enjoyed Monday to Saturday from 10am-9pm, serving breakfast on Saturday, closed on Sunday… The Buckhorn is open on Saturdays and Sundays from 10am-Midnight, serving weekend brunch each day from 10am-3pm featuring Bloody Marys, Mimosas, Eggs Benedict, Pancakes, Biscuits & Gravy, and ‘healthy stuff’ like Jean’s Greek Yoghurt parfait served with muesli and fresh berries! They are open weekdays at 11am and are closed on Tuesdays… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu and have now expanded their hours to Thursday thru’ Monday evenings. They cook by reservation so call (707)-895-2210… The Q and Aquarelle, formerly Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar, has a new ‘Santa Maria BBQ’ menu, featuring ribs and chicken, added to their previous favorites. Open 4-8pm from Friday thru’ Taco Tuesday… The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do, with reliable hours that everyone can remember and rely on (6am-8pm every day!) – don’t forget to try the donuts!… Stone and Embers in The Madrones is open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… Finally, down in the Deep End, The Bewildered Pig is open Thursday-Saturday, 4:30-5.30pm Happy Hour, Supper served from 5.30-9pm, and then on Sunday 11.30am-7pm. You can check out all of their “insane!” offerings on their well-maintained Facebook page… And that’s it for now… Meanwhile, I encourage you all to eat, drink, and be merry at one of the above establishments whenever you can – remember ‘eating out is fun’…

Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #542 – Live music returns to the Valley this Saturday, June 10, when The High Rollers, featuring Mendocino ‘All-stars’ Pilar Duran, Kevin Owens, and Tom Brown, will take the stage at Lauren’s Restaurant at 9pm – not to be missed!…#543 – In celebration of their 100th birthday today (June 7) the A.V. Lions have been waving entrance fees for all new members signing up in the last week and will continue to do so until Saturday, June 10. Not only will new members help the local club make an even bigger impact, they will belong to a distinguished group of “Centennial Lions,” in recognition of this unique moment in their history. Contact President Bill Harper at 895-2609…. #544 – The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have one more visits this month to the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo, that is next week on Thursday June 15. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them – making this an even better service than it already is!… #545 – The Anderson Valley Grange is having its regular second Sunday Pancake Breakfast on June 11 from 8:30-11am. Prices range from $5-10 – kids through hungry folks, for a delicious, locally-sourced breakfast. Choices include pancakes (gluten free available but gluten extra is not), eggs, and bacon, with a choice of juice, tea or coffee included… #546 – I believe that the Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley next Tuesday, June 13. Phone 463-4694 for confirmation. They are usually here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm.… #547 – The Anderson Valley Museum is open every Saturday and Sunday from 1pm-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, visiting the Museum is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours to spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’… #548 – The monthly meeting of the ‘Preparation for the Rest of Our Lives’ group takes pace at Lauren’s Restaurant at 4pm on Sunday, June 11. This is a gathering at which this important but so often avoided topic, and the options available to all of us at some point, will be discussed amongst Valley folks… #549 – The Boonville Farmers’ Market has moved from its winter location at The General Store and taken up residence across the street at the usual spot in the Boonville Hotel parking lot with their new summer hours 9.30am-Noon. For more info, call Cindy at 895-2949… #550 – Need a burn permit? Well the Fire Department no longer issues them so you now have to go to the Cal Fire Buildings at the far south end of town, beyond the gravel pits and behind the San Quentin-esque style fences…
As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, June 8, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Beef Stroganoff followed by Carrot Cake… Then, next Tuesday, June 13, the evening meal served at 6pm, will feature Ham, Potluck Potatoes and Banana Split Cake for dessert. As this is the 2nd Tuesday of the month, the dinner will be followed by Bingo at 7pm… All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal – it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Meanwhile, on Tuesday and Thursday from 9-9.45am the Center offers ‘Young at Heart Exercise’ with Linda Boudoures and Karen DeFalco… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am-Noon it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday’s and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don’t forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

I’m outta here – I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again: be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture9@gmail.com>
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… Missing the Venerable Pheasant… On the sheep, Grace…

A Bird’s Eye View #497 – 31st May, 2017

Thursday, June 1st, 2017

Greetings one and all. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… First, I must point out that almost everything below is true, probably around 99%. However, the whole truth is withheld because, as a wise Valley man known as Deekin’ once said, “If I told you the whole truth then you’d be as smart as me”… I like your thinkin,’ Deekin’…
Something that is true, but somewhat hard to believe, is the fact that one morning last week a used condom was discovered in a planter outside the A.V.A. office in the heart of Boonville! One of the obvious suspects, the A.V.A.’s Major Scaramella, has been ruled out as the person who deposited it there by local investigators essentially because, in his own words, “women don’t like me.” This is not strictly accurate but I know what he is saying… The other prime suspect, our Supreme Leader, Sir Bruce Anderson, a fine conversationalist and not an unhandsome man to certain members of the opposite sex I’m sure, is acting suspiciously pleased with himself and seeing him leap up the office steps after his rigorous morning workout in the parking lot I cannot help but think that further investigations as to the culprit are not necessary. All that remains of interest to the community is for the lucky (I have to assume) lady to reveal herself. After all, the prime suspect is a gentleman and will never kiss and tell… And on an equally disturbing note, related to the unsavory and mischievous hanky-panky in and around the A.V.A. offices, it is also true that small rogue marijuana plants are growing in a couple of the other, condom-free, planters at the edge of the parking lot at the front of that the same location… It’s all very odd and I think some explaining should be forthcoming…

Let’s move on to more edible aspects of Valley life – the Turkey Vulture’s update on ‘Evening Dining in the Valley’… In geographical order, as you travel through the Valley on Highway 128, here is the latest on ‘The Big Eight Eateries’… Lauren’s Restaurant sees Libby (of Libby’s Restaurant in Philo fame) as the Guest Chef every Monday evening from 5-9pm, while their regular hours remain Thursday-Sunday, 11.30am-2.30pm for lunch, and dinner on Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9pm… Lizbby’s, the Mexican Restaurant in downtown Boonville, can be enjoyed Monday to Saturday from 10am-9pm, serving breakfast on Saturday, closed on Sunday… The Buckhorn is open on Saturdays and Sundays from 10am-Midnight, serving weekend brunch each day from 10am-3pm featuring Bloody Marys, Mimosas, Eggs Benedict, Pancakes, Biscuits & Gravy, and ‘healthy stuff’ like Jean’s Greek Yoghurt parfait served with muesli and fresh berries! They are open weekdays at 11am and are closed on Tuesdays… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu and have now expanded their hours to Thursday thru’ Monday evenings. They cook by reservation so call (707)-895-2210… The Q and Aquarelle, formerly Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar, has a new ‘Santa Maria BBQ’ menu, featuring ribs and chicken, added to their previous favorites. Open 4-8pm from Friday thru’ Taco Tuesday… The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do, with reliable hours that everyone can remember and rely on (6am-8pm every day!) – don’t forget to try the donuts!… Stone and Embers in The Madrones is open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… Finally, down in the Deep End, The Bewildered Pig is open Thursday-Saturday, 4:30-5.30pm Happy Hour, Supper served from 5.30-9pm, and then on Sunday 11.30am-7pm. You can check out all of their “insane!” offerings on their well-maintained Facebook page… And that’s it for now… Meanwhile, I encourage you all to eat, drink, and be merry at one of the above establishments whenever you can – remember ‘eating out is fun’…
Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #546 – The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital visit the Valley on two Thursdays in June. They will be at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo, from 2-3.30pm tomorrow, June 1 and then again in two weeks time, on June 15. To avoid a line perhaps turn up at around 3pm – you will definitely be seen. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them – making this an even better service than it already is!… #547 – Resuming their summer hours of 9.30am-Noon, the Boonville Farmers’ Market has settled in at their usual summer location at the Boonville Hotel parking lot generously donated each week by community-spirited hotelier J Schmitt. For more information, call Cindy at 895-2949… #548 – The next monthly Barn Sale at The Big Barn alongside the St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way, just north of Boonville, will take place on the weekend of Saturday/Sunday, June 10/11 from 9am to 3pm each day…#549 – The A.V. Lending Library run by The Unity Club is open Tuesdays from 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm at The Fairgrounds in Boonville… #550 – The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Dump Executive Director, Mike Mannix, rewards good customers with a star but will be very harsh with anyone thinking they can leave dead animals!…

As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, June 1, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew as always at Noon, will be Meatloaf, Mashed Potatoes and gravy followed by Birthday Cupcakes… Then, next Tuesday, June 6, the lunch will feature Sesame Noodles with Chicken and for dessert you will be able to ‘Make Your Own Sundaes’! All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal – it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Meanwhile, on Tuesday and Thursday from 9-9.45am the Center offers ‘Young at Heart Exercise’ with Linda Boudoures and Karen DeFalco… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am-Noon it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday’s and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don’t forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…
The Three-Dot Lounge, home of “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, remains closed for reasons far too scandalous to share in such a family newspaper as this… I will say that it has nothing to do with the even more ‘scandalous’ events at the local school, continuing and disconcerting goings-on that you can no doubt read about elsewhere in this newspaper
Well that’s all for this week – I’m outta here as I’ve got see a man about a sheep…So, until we talk again: be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture – saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture9@gmail.com>
p.p.s. Hi, George – hope you and Sheila are well… Is that ‘lafter’ I hear, Carroll?… Bobwhite Quail – keep up the knitting!